Burn Unit: Offline Roast AI

Burn Unit writes savage, specific, genuinely funny roasts about whatever you feed it — your bio, your commit messages, your friend's indefensible playlist — and it does the whole thing on your phone. THE AI RUNS ON YOUR PHONE There is no account and no sign-up, and the model that writes the roasts runs on your phone's own chip rather than on somebody's server. Your text is never sent away to be turned into a roast, and the app keeps working in airplane mode. The app asks once whether it may keep anonymous copies of your roasts to improve its safety filters - no name, no account, no device identifier, nothing tying a roast back to you. Say no and nothing is ever sent. The app works exactly the same either way, and you can change your mind whenever you like. HOW IT WORKS 1. Type or paste anything. 2. Tap "Roast it". 3. Read the damage. Share it if it lands. BEFORE YOU INSTALL — PLEASE READ THIS PART • One-time download. The first time you open the app it fetches an AI model of about 2.4 GB. Use Wi-Fi. You only ever do this once, and it keeps downloading if you switch apps. • Storage. Keep several GB free. The model and the compiled version of it that makes the app fast both live on your device. • This is a demanding app. It needs a recent phone with a lot of memory. Google Play should hide it from devices that cannot run it — if it installed and feels slow, that is why. IT IS MEAN. THAT IS THE POINT. Burn Unit is built to be harsh about what you did, made, said, chose, wore or shipped. It is not built to attack who you are. Every roast is checked before you see it, and anything that goes after someone's race, religion, gender, sexuality, disability or age — or anything touching self-harm — is blocked instead of shown. The filters are not perfect and we do not pretend otherwise. Every roast has a Report button, which flags that roast for review. Reports are what the filters get tightened against. ABOUT THE AI Roasts are generated by an on-device language model. They are invented. They can be wrong, unfair, repetitive or simply unfunny, and nothing the app writes is a statement of fact about any real person. Not for anyone under 17. Contains crude humour and strong language throughout.