Corporate Burn Rate

FREE TO PLAY: ENTRY-LEVEL INTERN Is your career being slowly liquidated by "quick syncs" that last three hours? Welcome to the resistance. Corporate Burn Rate is the premier satirical simulation for the modern professional. It doesn't just track the literal dollar value your company is wasting on useless meetings—it gives you the tools to survive the grind while looking like a top performer. FINANCIAL SIMULATION: TRACK THE BURN Watch the "Burn Rate" ticker calculate the cost of every "deep dive" as it happens. • Flexible Math Logic: Track by individual rate (Per Person) or lock in a combined hourly cost (Total Team). • Persistence: Your headcount and rates stay locked between sessions—no resetting required for the next meeting. STEALTH MINI-GAMES & DISGUISES Use our advanced disguises when a manager walks by. Your screen instantly transforms into a "boring" professional environment. • Instant Disguises: Mask your activity as a Spreadsheet or Linux Terminal. • Double Tap Exit: A quick double-tap anywhere on the screen returns you to the dashboard instantly. • Pro Disguises: CEO Mode unlocks VS Code, Kanban Boards, and "Fake System Update" screens. HIGH-STAKES ARCADE & FIDGETS We provide two levels of distraction depending on how much "focus" you need to fake: • Interactive Games (Skill-Based): Engage in challenges like Cell Snake and ASCII Pong. These require skill and provide a scoring system to track your "productivity." • Sensory Fidgets (Mindless Relief): Perfect for keeping your hands busy under the table with zero pressure. Balance budgets or scrub terminal logs in theme-specific mini-tasks. THE CHAOS ENGINE Need a reason to bail? Use the Excuse Generator to create perfectly plausible, technical reasons to "drop and investigate a critical event." CORPORATE BINGO Transform buzzword-heavy presentations into a game. Mark off jargon like "Pivot," "Synergy," and "Low Hanging Fruit." PROMOTED TO CEO MODE (ONE-TIME UNLOCK) *RECENTLY OPTIMIZED: We executed a strategic cost-reduction. Unlock the full executive suite at our new, permanently lowered baseline price!* Standard employees track the burn; CEOs control it. Upgrade to unlock the full executive suite: • The Full Arsenal: Access all 8 Premium Visual Themes (Hacker, Vaporwave, Blueprint, SCADA, etc.) and the complete suite of 8 Executive Fidgets and 8 High-Stakes Games. • Exclusive Access: Unlock high-velocity games like Stack Crash, Hostile Takeover, and Synergy Valve. • Payroll Wizard: Build your meeting roster by role (Interns, Devs, VPs) to calculate the weighted average automatically. Save your favorite team configurations for instant loading. • Advanced History: Retention for up to 500 meetings with total waste metrics (Entry-level users see the last 3). • Custom Bingo: Edit the dictionary in Settings to add your boss’s specific favorite catchphrases. • Themed Chaos: Unlock infinite excuses and industry-specific jargon pools (NetOps, DevOps, PM, Gov) for maximum believability. Stop being a passive observer of your own career. Start tracking the burn. Disclaimer: This app is for satirical and entertainment purposes only. Please "circle back" responsibly.